Exciting times methinks as I’ve had several emails from readers of my last effort “Georgie Porgie”,   something I find quite heartening. It concerns TT (tobacco tax) and the necessity of such.

Contrary to the thoughts from the likes of Arnott, Duffy et al, three American states are now into reducing the price of a pack of twenty puffers as they see new buyers from across the borders, tourists, people with money to spend etc. Now this is not a new device by any means but New Hampshire, New Jersey and Rhode Island are all considering attracting smokers, or at least buyers of smoking products across their borders. Well ten out of ten for them, they have finally cottoned on that smokers are permanent spenders and that there is important revenue to be had via smokers.

It might also occur to a few (excluding Debs & Sheila of course) that reducing taxation slightly might just encourage smokers NOT to seek ‘man in van’ for their wares – I doubt it because of the vast price differential but one can always live in hope.

There is always another side to the coin and that might just be the fact that all three states are fast approaching California style financial status…err… skint! Poor old ‘Arnie’ is still contemplating whether to legalise ‘marijuana’ as his “Zurich-gnomes” have revealed that $16bn a year can be raised through taxation – of yet another plant! He’s still on our TV screens urging us to “come over and work with us” but as they are potless I think I’ll give that a miss this year!

Todays news kicks the week of Budget speculation off with a stark warning from the Tobacco Manufacturers Association, a most respectable body of people, who warn that “expected duty rises in Wednesday’s Budget will undermine efforts to curb smuggling“.

Surely NOT!

In a study compiled for the TMA in 2010 it showed that 21.1% of ‘hand rolling tobacco’ used had avoided British style taxation. That is more than a fifth yet we have a pair of numbskulls bleating like lost sheep that higher taxation is the key to cutting smoking rates! How do these people keep their worthless jobs that are highly overpaid? People are NOT going to quit smoking if they don’t want to quit, even though various anti-tobacco organisations claim that anything between 52%-85% of smokers ‘are desprate to quit’. Change the bloody record!

Those that want to quit have had almost 4 years to do so, yet continue to smoke so why do these ridiculously inflated figures continually get media attention – massive media attention actually! The answer is simple: ASH et al need to keep their own profile high up the list, which is why, now they are running out of steam, they are supporting the anti-alcohol lobbyists “with their valuable anti smoking lessons“. They are simply ensuring that they stay on the payroll as Lansley (the new puppet) follows the Who‘s instructions to the letter. Cameron might as well get rid of Clegg and his bunch of illiberal cronies for “Liberal” they most certainly are not!

In fact, the more I think about it the more I like the idea of all smokers clubbing together and buying the Isle of Wight! That way, all smokers can live happily without non-smokers moaning and groaning non-stop (the few that do know who they are) and peace and equanimity can once more return to our land. There’s enough water between the island and mainland for even the most fearsome wisp of smoke to have dissipated somewhere over the Solent so that the good people of ‘Pompey’ need not fear for their lives!

Arnott & Duffy can continue to claim their nonsensical wage packets, they can continue to vilify smokers (and anyone thinking of taking up smoking!), introduce a law than banishes anyone reported as smoking (whether they actually did or not is immaterial-as we know) to eternal damnation on the Isle of Wight.

One proviso however, I demand that the sad deaths due to any form of cancer on the mainland be recorded (by people of honesty & integrity) as the island will do for its smoking population, because as we are all fully aware, smoking has been blamed for every type of cancer known to man over the past 6/7 years. The figures from the totally smoke-free mainland will be very interesting indeed!

It’s so blindingly simple, it’s brilliant, as it instantly rids the country of smokers yet still allows choice. Just think folks, that tiny little island will be full of non-oppressed, happy people and the government will still be getting its £11bn per annum from the smokers without having to waste a few hundred £million per annum as they do now!

I wonder how much it would cost to purchase the island?

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